Bibliography

I just sit here, staring at my reflection without any reason or why. To portray myself as I see fit would be a lie. To know me, talk to those that have cared for me or get to know me by being with me. Do not judge a person over the internet. “Online” is not a real portrayal of ones self or ones personality. Expression is lost; physical being is lost. Reading a book then seeing the movie can destroy a great book and the same is true in the other direction. Through erratic pictures, fantasizing words and retarded conversation a creation of character becomes present in ones mind; though, reality does not take part in this creation and can betray a friendship that may of spawned into… . . .

2006 14 03, it was the fall to rise of my life thus far…

“hey man, i was scopin out purevolume and i came across your guitar shit and your pretty rad. i live in clearwater b.c if u know wher that is. like an hour drive from kamloops. if your lookin for a good heavy metal band to play with we'd like it if u can down to try it out. we have 2 guitar players but one really isn't workin out that well for us, he's real good, just not dedicated. We're called Corporate Murder and we play sum real deap shit. we rn't on purevolume yet, but we're working on that. if u wanna here more bout us plz e-mail me back, and i hope u consider tryin us out. thanks
Jordan of Corporate Murder”

... and so it began. After such messages you become uneasy and nervous of the situation; fortunately, I took Jordan up on his offer and met Corporate Murder. Soon there after, every weekend or every second one the other guitarist came and took me to Clearwater. Consequently, the band was taking me away from my loving girlfriend and it started to weaken a relationship that was on a butter knife. When balancing a girlfriend, a band and skool, life becomes hectic and one always falls behind. My girlfriend was very important to me and so I attempted to spend every waking moment with her, when I wasn’t in Clearwater. I felt that our relationship was improving, growing for some reason. Life was up in all aspects. Skool was almost done and my marks were fairly good, I was in a band and my girlfriend was happy.

When a fork presents itself you always momentarily regret the decision you have made. My major decision this summer was to either to go home to Hazelton with my girlfriend, and hope to hell I would have something to do all summer, or stay in Kamloops find a minimal waged job, play in the band and only see my girlfriend three times all summer. The desire of being in a band and the desire to have a job all summer kept me in Kamloops. Honestly, I do thoroughly regret making that choice. Loosing Deanna again was… as painful as the first. The memories remain; though gently, wounds that may have been scars upon my flesh are now being cleansed away. My being will not be torn, sinned or scorn…

By today, 2006 09 07, since 2006 08 06, my days have been growing more and more pleasing; moreover, my being content with life has gone nowhere I could of ever imagined. Corporate Murder has slowly become a key band in the Kamloops metal scene. With the replacing of out past guitarist, incorporating Mike Griggs, Corporate Murder is striving for success more now then ever. Coinciding with these strives forward amongst the band, my life has been mixed about once more (in a great way).